Alone Again
by xxTemporaryGenius
Summary: Sasuke has left Sakura in the village to begin his (apparently twelve) yearlong mission. But can Sakura handle being left alone again by the man she loves; or has his past actions permanently scarred her? (ONESHOT) (SakuraxSasuke)(Ino)


**I don't know... it was just something that was niggling at my mind. With the latest chapter, and well every other chapter, I just couldn't help but wonder what was happening to Sakura. (who by the way, better become total badass mumma in the next chapter)**

 **Anyway, enjoy :)**

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The sound of a screaming baby echoed itself into the bedroom of the sleeping roseate. She opened a dreary eye to the dark room illuminated by a faint glow from a clock on the opposite side. She shut her eye, not wanting to move from her cosy position at three in the morning. _It is too early for this, baby girl,_ she thought rolling over to face the middle of the bed, pulling the light purple sheets up to her chin as she went.

"Sasuke…" she mumbled and lifted her hand out, patting at the air trying to find his body. "Can you get her, Sasuke?"

"Sakura, are you awake?" A voice which was not her husband softly spoke into the room from the doorway. Though she didn't move or give any signs of life, the figure at the door continued. "I will get her."

 _No. It's not Sasuke. Ino. It's Ino's voice._

Sakura curled up and put fists against her temple, eyes cringed closed, now not wanting to open them – not wanting to see the empty space in the bed which he left. Immediately her breaths quickened with panic – something which happened every time she thought of him leaving her again. _Why? Why do you always have to leave me? How could I forget that? How could I forget that you are gone, again?_

Tears dampen her eyelids as she finally decides to open them to the early morning, still taking trembling breaths. There was a dry taste in her mouth, leaving her tongue to feel like sandpaper scraping the insides of her cheeks. It was a familiar feeling – a constant feeling – of complete and utter loss that plagued her mind.

The reason he left was to ensure their child a safer future, and for that she was eternally grateful, but, after not hearing from him, her mind had begun to wonder to more darkened ideas. It was almost a constant reminder of the past, a past in which she would never forget despite her desperate attempts. And she thought that once he had come back to the village, he would stay for good. Even when she had fallen pregnant, he still insisted to go, leaving her again.

Sitting up in bed, the roseate heard the other woman shuffle down to the other room. "Come now, Sarada," she cooed softly at the baby. The shrieking cries didn't stop, but they quietened. Ino had taken it upon herself to care for her friend, and her Godchild. It was a relief to have the extra help from her best friend, who often stayed most nights of the week, but Sakura only felt more and more guilty. Ino had a partner, and they had a life together, and she was getting in the road of that. But Ino was a stubborn one, and put up a protest when the roseate had tried to get her to leave.

She tried to stop herself from glancing at the empty bed, but her efforts were in vain. The sheets where still tucked neatly under an untouched pillow, and a crease was barely seen breaking the surface. Sakura's heart dropped again.

"I need you," she whispered to the bed, to the dark, to anything and everything that wasn't her husband. Her hands were shaking as she held them close to her body and brought her knees up to her chest. "I need you. I need you. I need you. I need you." Her pleas hiccupped with sobbing, and tears dripped down and off her nose, splashing onto the bed.

"How could you do this to me, Sasuke? How could you leave me again?" Her voice getting angrier as the words poured out of her mouth. Ino, having managed to calm the baby, was standing outside listening to her friend. She knew Sakura was like a volcano, and this was just so much pressure that it was only time until she exploded. As the baby stirred in her arms, she tried to console it whilst thinking of a strategy to calm the pink-haired woman.

Sakura, gripping her hair firmly in her fists, rocked back and forth in her sitting position. She hated herself for not being strong enough, but she had been strong her entire life waiting for him, and now he had left her again. _A brighter future_. She remembered his words and that the reason for leaving was to ensure that their child wouldn't have to ever experience the hardships that they suffered through. _You didn't have to leave though. Surely there could have been someone, anyone, who could have gone._

 _Why did you have to go?_

At the time, his proposal to leave had broken her heart, and though she begged him to stay, she knew that it was only him who could do the task. When he left, it only brought up more painful recollections of the past – to the one when he first left – the one where he thanked her before knocking her unconscious. This time, after her desperate pleas of reasoning, he had waited until she had fallen asleep to leave. _You never even got to meet your daughter._

 _Why are you still this pathetic, crying person? What am I doing wrong?_ She asked herself questions liked these constantly, but never received an answer.

"Why aren't you here? You should be here. Where are you?" The crying woman felt a hand, rough but familiar brush against hers. She looked up to see his black eyes and sad smile. _What? How? This can't be real._ Sakura squeezed his hand and a soft chuckle came from above her.

"Sakura…" he said tenderly, placing a large palm on the side of her face to which she nuzzled into.

"I… Sasuke, I need you." Her vision became blurry as tears swelled in her green eyes before sliding down her face. She lunged forward into his arms; burying her head into his chest.

"Sakura," he soothed, running his fingers through silky pink hair. She tightened her grip – something which was dangerous considering her capable strength. _This is not real. He feels real._

"How am I supposed to live when you keep leaving me? I don't understand? How am I supposed to be a decent mother to _our_ child? What am I supposed to tell her when she asks to see her father? I need you, Sasuke. I need you. Stop leaving me alone." Sakura sobbed into his shirt, breathing in his scent – something she had not done for months, and was certain not to do for years, at least.

 _I need you…_

"Sakura? Sakura!" The pink-haired roseate looked around to see Ino's silhouette standing in the doorway, holding her sleeping child. She then quickly spun around back to her husband, and felt a sharp pain go through her heart when all she saw was a dark, empty room.

 _So, it was just my imagination. It felt so real though._ Damn it, Sasuke…

"Sakura?" Ino said again with hesitance.

The woman turned back to face her friend and gave a sad smile – trying to convince both herself and Ino that she was alright. The pale-blonde walked over and sat down on the bed, offering the baby to her mother. Sakura softly picked the infant up and cradled her in her arms whilst trying to control her short breaths and leaking eyes.

"I… I just…" Sakura stuttered, trying to explain herself to Ino. The child's eyes opened and her nose screwed up as she rubbed her eyes with chubby hands. _You look_ s _o much like your father._ She smiled looking down at her daughter.

"Oh, Sakura." Ino put her arm around the duo and pulled the other woman close to her, resting her head on Sakura's shoulder. "You are so strong."

The roseate wanted to believe her. As she broke her gaze away from her daughter's black eyes, Ino pulled her head back, and was now watching Sakura with kind, turquoise eyes. Sakura couldn't find the words to thank Ino for all she had done for both her and her child; but for now, all she could manage was, "I will put Sarada back to bed. You should get some sleep." The pale-blonde gave a weak smile and a simple nod as she watched the pink kunoichi walked out of the room.

She didn't turn on the light when walking to the infant's room and the glow from the window ensured that Sakura didn't run into the crib. She kissed the wide forehead of her child before placing her down onto the white sheets. Keeping an eye on her as she rolled over and curled her hands up under her chin, Sakura, without even realising, began talking. "I miss your father so much. It hurts. It hurts everywhere. But, we are going to be okay." She took a deep breath and continued, unable to stop. "I miss hugging him, kissing him… just being with him. After what we went through as kids, I miss just being able to lean on his body, to listen to his heart." The black-haired baby's mouth twitched at the corners and Sakura's heart melted. "That grin… I miss that grin – his grin." Refusing to cry anymore, she wiped away tears that had yet to fall, and stroked the cheek of her daughter. "Sarada," she sayed softly – almost a lullaby – "we are going to be okay.

"You are going to be a wonderful mother, Sakura." That voice. Sakura stopped and closed her eyes, trying to block his voice, hoping that when she opened them, he would not be there, tempting her to run into his arms yet again. _No. It's not real. It's not real._

"Damn you," she managed to spit. He didn't say anything, he didn't need to. "Damn you. Shannaro."

"She has your eyes." His voice sounded close, but she was shocked when she peeked through squinted eyelids to see him right next to her. Sakura felt her shoulders drop and her held breath give way – legs turning wobbly underneath her. She felt as if she was going to faint. _My eyes?_ She thought. "Such brave eyes." He turned to her and locked his fingers around her tiny hands. Sakura gave in, jumping up, wrapping her arms around him and planting her lips firmly onto his. "Sakura?" His face was sad and sorrowful as he broke the moment.

The roseate shook her head, holding a trembling hand to her forehead. "No… You aren't real."

"You are right."

"Oh God, I'm going mad."

"Perhaps." Sasuke squeezed her hand. "You need to get some sleep."

Sakura nodded and put a palm on his chest, searching for something. Sasuke grabbed her, pulling her up in a swift motion until he was carrying her in his arms. _Not real,_ she kept telling herself. But when she burrowed her head again and heard the thumping of his heart, she dismissed reality and immersed herself in delusion.

With eyes closed, she heard him carry her back to the room, feeling the covers under her as he placed her on the bed. Lying on her side, she watched as he too lay down – long, black hair flowing out over the pillow.

"Sleep…" Sakura mumbled. "Sleep would be nice." _No, having you here for real would be nice._ Her eyes began to feel heavier and heavier and she fought to keep them open – to remain staring at his narrow face.

"Sakura…" He stroked her cheek and inched forward until she could feel the heat of his steady breaths. She felt gentle arms wrap around her shoulders.

"I will wait for you, Sasuke." She was losing her battle and as her eyelids closed, she caught one last glimpse of his precocious grin.

The roseate drifted off to sleep, wrapped in his protective arms.

 _But don't leave me alone, Sasuke. I don't want to be alone again._

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 **I hope you liked it. I really am enjoying this fanfiction writing. And the community is so supportive. Thank you all :D**


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